Creating Calm and Being (More) You and We As We Continue to Shift, Grow and Heal


I find myself sitting under a tree right now for the umpteenth time this week, thinking, feeling and grounding.

The times we’re living in right now are bringing up so much. 

How do we navigate this, help and take care of ourselves and each other?

All I can say (well, not really all), but one thing I can share is I’m feeling tender, vulnerable, open, connected and intense moments of sadness.

And, as I am want to do, I am feeling it all. I am allowing it all. And, this, as it always does, is grounding me into my truth and into this world.

Know our emotions always have a place for us in the space of the world, just allowing for these and connecting to these helps us to feel safer. First, with ourselves. Then, with each other.

As we do this, we feel more like ourselves. We connect to our humanity, which helps others to do the same in relation to us. (The world SO desperately needs so much more of this!) And, we’re able to step out in bigger ways to share ourselves and our gifts and to help one another, the people and causes that are most important to us. 

With this, I want to give you three ways (and themes I’m seeing in my sessions) that will help you to begin or continue to make powerful shifts into healing, alignment and truth. Then, below this, I share ways for us to become more we, as we make the shift from separation to oneness.

Becoming More You:

1. Make the Time to Feel It All. Whether it’s for five minutes per day or longer, most of us are desiring to feel more calm, grounded and even safer (and safety) in our world. This starts, first and foremost, with honoring and feeling our emotions. Notice tears coming up? Instead of suppressing them, start or grow a practice of leaning in. Notice, even if you just take a minute for these, what you feel in your body and what happens with this. I always feel more calm, grounded, safe and embodied the more I do this. And, if you find yourself resisting this, this is where you start – by feeling the resistance. 

2. Move Out of Survival Mode and Into Creation Mode. So many people, especially right now, are just trying to navigate, and really, get through, each day. This is understandable, and yet, when we do this, we are denying the powerful beings that we are and we are not in our truth. Instead, view everyday as your canvas. What canvas are you going to create that day? Will that canvas be one of calm and healing or chaos? And, make a decision when you wake up that morning, what this is going to look like, recognizing that if you ask for a calm day, and yet, to feel this way, you need to feel some anger first, an experience might happen in your day to help you to feel this, so don’t miss out on it. Feel it, and then allow yourself to move into your day, re-choosing the calm so it doesn’t derail you. 

3. Believe in Infinite Possibilities. Whether it’s a world where black lives matter and all are treated equally and fairly, a world where we are no longer in lockdown and CV is in our past, or something else that’s personal for you, most of us shut off possibilities in one way or another. When this is happening, it’s important to notice this and ask yourself,  

If I could have this any way I wanted this, what would that be?

Visualize it. Get into the feeling of it. Then, take action accordingly. 

Becoming More We:

1. Is What You’re Posting and Sharing Divisive or Connecting? So, first, as I’ve mentioned many times, wherever you are, you have every right to feel that way. Honoring and feeling this is Step #1. That being said, it’s important that we notice when we’re sharing divisive, separating and/or hurtful comments. If someone is genuinely trying to help, and yet their comment doesn’t feel good to you, can you first see them from a space of compassion and that they’re just another human being doing the best they can, and then share something that can help them, versus putting more hurtful energy out in the field? Again, we have every right to be angry (or whatever emotion comes up for us), but responding from this, without first, feeling it, and then, connecting to your own heart, and then seeing their heart and remembering we’re all connected (which I get can be extremely hard during these times), while it might feel satisfying in the moment, understand that it actually spreads more of the energy that we’re trying to change.

2. See Someone’s Humanity and Heart. I mention this above, but it is worth repeating, highlighting and expanding on. We are all connected. While this can be hard to see, especially when we feel someone is saying something cruel and/or ignorant, this is a human being inside of there that is just doing the best they can. If we can see the little kid that lives inside of each of us that knows no better and never learned anything different, and understand, that many people attach to beliefs during their childhood for fear of not being loved and not feeling safe, and even deeper, for a fear of being abandoned or dying if they don’t buy into this, this can help us to have more compassion and spread more kindness, care and even love, in the world. Which leads me to my last point.

3. Our Truth is Love. This is so important right now as it can be easy to fall into hate, anger or shaming, to name a few. While these may feel good in the moment, know these are not going to get us out of what’s going on in our world right now. With this, and I believe this with my whole-heart, the more we connect to ourselves, heal our traumas and feel our emotions, the more we will know this deep truth, and with this, the more connected we feel to ourselves and each other and the more we could never dream of hurting another human being. 

This is truth, beauty and love in action.

Loving you, loving us and loving me (which will be an important piece for all of us), as we navigate into something new,
Deb

A Poem, “What I Want You to Feel in My Presence”
I want you to feel cared for.
I want you to feel wanted.
I want you to feel needed.
I want you to feel loved.
And, I want you to feel me.
For when you can feel me (and me you), we get closer to the truth of who we are.
We get closer to ourselves and each other.
Most importantly, we get closer to our humanity.
And, this, my friends, is what will change the world.

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